All the Horror You Need to Stream in July 2022 – Film School Rejects

Welcome to Horrorscope, a monthly column keeping horror nerds and initiates up to date on all the horror content coming to and leaving from your favorite streaming services. Here’s what to watch in July 2022:
Summer is in full swing, and you know what that means: it’s time to crack open the sweatier, sunnier corners of our horror watchlists. What can we say? Sleepaway camp slashers hit different in the hotter months. Indeed, as we repeat time and time again around these parts, horror is an all-year affair. For proof, look no further than how many horror films are hitting streaming services this July. There ain’t no rest for the wicked, as they say.
This month brings all manner of ghoulish goodies from hot new curated collections to spicy new releases to tried-and-true classics. We’ve got a little bit of each represented in our special monthly picks below.
So all that said be sure to peruse the complete list below, calendar in hand, for a full picture of what horror movies are coming and going from your favorite streaming services in July 2022. Keep in mind that all dates listed below may not apply to viewers outside the US.
The Burning
Synopsis: One day, at a summer camp, some extremely respectful and kind-hearted kids pull an innocent prank on their summer camp’s caretaker. Just kidding they leave a goopy, flaming, bug-infested skull next to his bed. And surprise, surprise the candle-lit hunk of flesh causes the poor caretaker’s cabin to catch fire. Maimed beyond belief and improbably alive, Cropsey the caretaker (yes, that Cropsey) grabs the nearest pair of garden sheers and gets to murdering as many disrespectful campers as he can.
Directed by BAFTA-nominated English filmmaker Tony Maylam, The Burning is a great watch for horror fans looking to venture off the beaten path with their summer camp slasher viewing. On the surface, The Burning boasts a pretty standard formula as far as its subgenre is concerned (and a certain real-life monster being involved in story development is unfortunate, to say the least).
But, The Burning‘s unique boons are well worth your time. Living legend Tom Savini delivers some genuinely savage and stomach-churning practical makeup effects (he turned down Friday the 13th Part 2 to work on this film). The film also boasts some leering POV camera work from cinematographer Harvey Harrison, whose credits include gun kata mainstay Equilibrium and Pierce Brosnan’s inaugural 007 venture GoldenEye. The film also boasts some delightfully early career appearances from Jason Alexander and Holly Hunter. More cruel and mean-spirited than the vast majority of its camp-set peers, The Burning is an unpredictable, grisly watch.
Available on Shudder July 1st.
Friday The Th Remake E
Synopsis: A group of young adults who walked straight out of a Michael Bay film set up shop at a boarded-up campsite crack beers and cut loose. Supposedly, the abandoned summer camp was the site of a series of gruesome murders back in the 1980s. Something about an overprotective mother seeking revenge for the death of her drowned child. But that’s all just urban legend, right?
Everyone has their favorite Friday the 13th film. But the real ones know the truth. The best entry in the long-running slasher series is Marcus Nispel‘s 2009 reboot. They made a whole lot of horror remakes in the 2000s. Some bad. Some good. What lands this flick in the latter category is its rock-solid respect for the 1980s slasher formula coupled with unrelenting modern ferocity.
Sure, there are gruesome kills and smooth-brained teens. But there’s also a genuinely upsetting sense of propulsion fuelled by blood, palpable tension, and the physical menace of Derek Mears as the hulking masked villain. The 2009 remake is as scary as Jason has ever been, bringing a real sense of terror and brutality back to a series that had long since jumped the shark (I say this as a Final Chapter and Jason X fan).
Leaving HBO Max July 31.
The Shallows
Synopsis: Nancy’s search for the perfect surf to process the recent death of her mother, med student Nancy sets off to a remote beach in Mexico. Ignoring warnings from locals of the capricious tide tables, Nancy lingers at what used to be one of her mother’s favorite spots. Then, before she can say “huh, is that a dead whale carcass?” Nancy finds herself trapped in the hunting grounds of a hungry great white shark. Stranded on a wave-swept embankment and with time running out, Nancy must keep her wits about her if she aims to feel the sand beneath her toes once more.
Featuring a rock-solid lead performance by Blake Lively (and a similarly commendable performance by the seagull named Sully who serves as her co-lead), The Shallows (2016) is a thrilling creature feature that punches far above its weight class. Between this, Orphan and the House of Wax remake, Jaume Collett-Serra has a solid resume as one of the 21st century’s more accomplished b-movie directors. Why don’t you use all that Jungle Cruise fuck you money to make another horror film, dude!
Available on Peacock on July 11.
If you want killer sharks, it may interest you to know that a whole smattering of films from the Jaws franchise will be available for free on Tubi as of July 16th.
Legend Of The Mountain
Synopsis: A young, befuddled scholar named Ho is tasked with translating an aphoristic Buddhist poem. Along his wandering journey through moonlit cobwebs and impossibly tall bamboo groves, Hu loses his way and encounters a series of ghostly visitations.
1979’s Legend of the Mountain was written, edited, and directed by the great King Hu, who rose to prominence in the 1960s and 70s as an authoritative voice of wuxia, a genre rooted in ancient Chinese folk tales of swords and sorcery. Released later in Hu’s career, at the height of his creative powers, Legend of the Mountain is an astonishing blend of myth and naturalism that will make you ask “Terrence Malick, who?”
Where some horror fans are more partial to gory kills or goopy creature features, Legend of the Mountain is a far more lingering and creepily ineffable viewing experience. Overtly operatic and brimming with craftsmanship, they just don’t make ’em like this anymore.
Available on ARROW July 1st.
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